Archives for Foundations of Love

Forgiveness leaves a trail…Track it and let it go

Sometimes when we say we forgive someone, we really mean that we are trying to forgive them. The reality of forgiveness is that it’s an ongoing practice and never an absolute one method. Forgiveness leaves a trail…Track it and let it go I thought I had forgiveness all wrapped up but didn’t realize that I forgot about resent.   Many years ago, in the middle of my marriage, I realized that I needed to do
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Parenting Your Inner Child During Your Breakup

When you’re in big “Heartbreak Land”, it’s difficult to be an adult. Your emotions take over and all you can think of is the pain and grief that you have to now endure. It’s at this very moment that you can decide how your grieving process will go by taking control of your emotional self, aka your Inner Child.  Parenting your Inner Child during your breakup is the key to effectively communicating your needs in
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How Forgiveness Can Set You Free

It hit me like a slap in the face. After a good whining session, my third lawyer said, ”Well, you picked him.” Gasp! I was shattered by the insensitivity that came out of his mouth. How dare he blame me for my ex’s bad behavior! Feeling victimized all over again, I left the office deflated and feeling powerless. I thought to myself, “Will no one stick up for me?” It was a hard road but
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The Power of NO – Setting healthy boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries after a breakup has taken on a new definition. With social media and modern technology, it seems like making a clean break is an impossible task. It’s all about how you do it that matters. We’ll explore how the power of “NO” is more important than ever when you want to forget and get on with your life. Why you can’t let go As I look back on my 20-year marriage and
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Blame Your Parents For Your Divorce.

In the way of the Buddha, there is no one to blame but yourself.  Or put another way, you are in complete control of everything that happens in your life whether you are conscious of this or not.  And forgiveness is one of the Buddhist teachings anyway so even if you wanted to blame someone, you have to forgive them at the same time. However, you can blame your parents for your divorce. And when
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5 Ways to Shake off Loneliness

Loneliness is considered a Modern-Day Epidemic. We are 30% more lonely than we were in 1984, and this statistic keeps rising. It seems coincidental with the parallel to the divorce rate and decreased rate of marriage. But with being more connected than ever, this paradox follows the trends of polarity we are seeing in many areas of our human existence. Without belaboring the point with all kinds of theories, let’s dive into why you are
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How to Cope with the Trauma of Divorce

When I started doing things that were out of character and saying things to colleagues that confused even me, I knew things weren’t right. I started realizing that I was in trauma during my separation.  I had to find out how to cope with the trauma of my divorce.   STRESS or TRAUMA?   It’s now in the zeitgeist, and we’re all being shown trauma. But back then we were only dealing with “stress”. It
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Overcome Abandonment by Working on Your Roots

“It felt like I was drop-kicked into outer space.” Those were the words I used with my therapist to describe the feeling I was going through during my separation. For years, I had this sensation of free-falling. It was intense as I tried to grasp onto whatever I could during my fall. I had to learn how to deal with and overcome this new sense of abandonment. I found that I could overcome abandonment by
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Resurrection – How I Rebuilt My Life

There were times when I thought that phase of my life would never end. My separation process lasted 5 years and seemed like an eternity. I lived in a perpetual state of not knowing what would happen next. I held my breath, bracing for the next gut-wrenching blow to a wound already open and festering. Emotional purgatory is what I used to call it. I longed to reclaim my life. I prayed for a resurrection.
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How To Tell If You’re Really Over Heartbreak

You think you’re over it. Your friends are pushing you to get online and start dating again. Or even worse, they try to set you up. But after all this time, are you really over your ex? How can you tell if you’re really over heartbreak? For you to answer that question, you first have to understand the phases of heartbreak and where you might be stuck. Heartbreak is grief. It’s the most common form
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