Archives for divorce

How Forgiveness Can Set You Free

It hit me like a slap in the face. After a good whining session, my third lawyer said, ”Well, you picked him.” Gasp! I was shattered by the insensitivity that came out of his mouth. How dare he blame me for my ex’s bad behavior! Feeling victimized all over again, I left the office deflated and feeling powerless. I thought to myself, “Will no one stick up for me?” It was a hard road but
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Eating Through Trauma

Eating through trauma is a misnomer. Because when you’re in trauma, you simply can’t eat. Even though our body needs essential nutrients to recover from the trauma our body is experiencing, it’s just not possible. When we are in trauma from heartbreak, it’s like a double whammy of heart pain and shock. And I have some ways to help your body recover from the trauma so that you can eat again. The first thing our
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3 Ways To Control Your Anger Safely

It’s OK to be angry.  Many people are walking around right now who are angry and frustrated at the way their lives have gone. And when you travel the journey of heartbreak after a breakup or divorce, you will hit the angry button one day, guaranteed. If you don’t already have good practices around dissolving your anger, you will suffer the volcano effect and create more damage in your life. Here are 3 ways to
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5 Ways to Shake off Loneliness

Loneliness is considered a Modern-Day Epidemic. We are 30% more lonely than we were in 1984, and this statistic keeps rising. It seems coincidental with the parallel to the divorce rate and decreased rate of marriage. But with being more connected than ever, this paradox follows the trends of polarity we are seeing in many areas of our human existence. Without belaboring the point with all kinds of theories, let’s dive into why you are
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Eliminating the shame of not being partnered

Our society doesn’t like things to be out of order. It says, we should all be in loving relationships and if you’re not, then there’s something wrong with you.  Your challenge then becomes eliminating the shame of not being partnered. I remember, viscerally, the feeling of being shunned and ostracized by the women who were part of my neighbourhood Mom tribe. The many years of supporting each other with our children: the PTA meetings, Fund-raisers,
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How to Cope with the Trauma of Divorce

When I started doing things that were out of character and saying things to colleagues that confused even me, I knew things weren’t right. I started realizing that I was in trauma during my separation.  I had to find out how to cope with the trauma of my divorce.   STRESS or TRAUMA?   It’s now in the zeitgeist, and we’re all being shown trauma. But back then we were only dealing with “stress”. It
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The 7 Costs of Heartbreak

You can't be a human being without experiencing heartbreak. It’s part of the human condition and it’s part of our experience from the very beginning of our lives.  The challenge then becomes how to heal from heartbreak and accept that heartbreak is a temporary condition.  We have the power to change this part of our life experience by understanding that there are 7 costs of heartbreak and how we can regain our happy self...
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Flowing through grief

Sadness starts as a thought. The realization that something has ended, is lost, will never be, will never be again. It strikes hard. The body reacts and then you must decide; do I resist this and try my best to pretend it didn’t happen or do I accept it and start flowing through the grief? That’s the question. I have found that the 6 stages of heartbreak each have their own quality. And when you
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When it’s impossible to forgive

You understand that forgiveness is a doorway to happiness, growth and freedom. You know you have to find forgiveness for all the wrong that you’ve experienced in your life to be free. But when the offence is too big to comprehend, and when it’s impossible to forgive, how do you let go of the victim story that's holding you back? What other alternatives to forgiveness is there that will make your journey more bearable...
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Overcome Abandonment by Working on Your Roots

“It felt like I was drop-kicked into outer space.” Those were the words I used with my therapist to describe the feeling I was going through during my separation. For years, I had this sensation of free-falling. It was intense as I tried to grasp onto whatever I could during my fall. I had to learn how to deal with and overcome this new sense of abandonment. I found that I could overcome abandonment by
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